Updates from Becca
I have wanted to write a blog for a
while now, but when you take care of 10 little girls under 10 years old, your
brain changes. Long ago, I would
have been able to come up with some beautiful, insightful words that perfectly
articulate the world in which I live and move. Thoughts that are not only therapeutic, but point to some
greater truth. But now, I have
what my friend Cathlene, calls ‘Mom Brain.’
All I can think about are the
details, the practical needs of the day-to-day, doctors appointments, who peed
their blankets, what I will feed my gluten-free child, how to get our smallest
6 year old to count to three, cleaning, diapers, new toothbrushes, fun
activities (aka pools), Christmas presents, upcoming birthdays, dentists,
attitude issues, how to give individual attention to each precious one,
fingernails, chapstick, baby walking, baby using sign language, baby throwing
tantrums, group home requirements, and the list goes on and on. Not to mention thoughts about the baby
inside of me and what that will look like with our big family here. It’s 3am and no wonder I’m
awake. So this blog might not turn
out as some deep, life changing note about life in Huehue and how we are
developing, but it will be real and honest because that’s all moms have energy
for when it comes down to it.
Life right now… so the children have been home for 2 months on school vacation. A little bit more than a month to go!!! Hallelujah.
Actually, school vacation with a big family becomes a way of life. It’s fun having more time with the
girls and getting to do things we don’t normally get to do, like going to a
mini-waterpark 2 hours away and Xela in a few weeks to go to a movie
theater! (We have been trying to
train them on how to not go to the bathroom a million times an hour, so
hopefully we can enjoy the movie). I’m not sure how I will handle the transition back to
school. I probably will remember
more things, have more clean underwear, and a cleaner house. Maybe we can get the smell of rotten
papaya that has developed over the last week to leave. We think a rat died in our ceiling…
lovely. But guess what, no time to
deal with that right now.
In the last month, we have welcomed two new girls into our foster family. They have been an unexpected and amazing addition to our family. I really did expect the worst because one is from the baby room, and to be honest, babies who grew up in the baby room have some serious issues, and one is older who came down from a group of older girls, who, well, have even more attitude issues. I pictured what we experienced in our first few months here. Attitude, rebellion, explosive tantrums, fighting, manipulation. Well, guess what, both girls have just jumped on in and have brought a positive influence into our home. I give the credit to our other girls because they welcomed them in with such loving hearts and explained to them how we do life in our group. This was so beautiful. As our scared former-‘baby,’ came in, she was welcomed to older sisters who just wanted to help and guide her and comfort her because they know how hard it is to leave the baby room. They told her you can call Becca, Mama, and Brook, Papi, if you want to because they love you, but you don’t have to. They told her ‘they are good to us and they give us snacks’.
Snacks ultimately are the biggest
reason our family functions, besides Jesus of course. As our older girl came in, super resistant and pissed off,
because this was supposed to be a three day discipline, her hard face soon softened
as the older girls excitedly told her how fun it was to be with our group
because we left the Fundacion every day and well, they get snacks. Field trips and snacks, people. These are the keys to parenthood. So what started out as a discipline for
an out-of-control child who was apparently manipulating other girls and calling
our administrator names (cockroach is one of our favorites) and not doing any
of her chores or personal hygiene responsibilities, has already called me mom
and gives me hugs all day, is excited to wash her clothes with the other girls,
is letting me brush her hair, and is now with us indefinitely with a big smile
on her face. Who knows why? Just Holy Spirit doing his thing, I
guess. Sure is not us, I can
promise you that.
The cool thing about this season is
that what we do really is impossible stuff. And that means, it’s not really us doing the hard work. It’s only Jesus. Literally. One baby is enough. We have 10. Pregnancy is hard. Here I am 4 months along and haven’t packed
my suitcases. (I have threatened
to many times though, when I am emotional at 3am). And it is not because I am good at what I do. It is pure grace, and grace alone. I just show up and do my best. I am super flawed. I lose my patience. I get frustrated. I lay on the kitchen floor crying
sometimes when I can’t get up, throwing a little fit like my 6 year olds. I literally forget everything and don’t
speak English or Spanish perfectly.
I cry. I think my children
are the most wonderful and stupidest gifts from God at the same time. I am selfish. Everyday I say I want to go home, but
that is mostly because I want a shower that works, a rat/bug free living
environment that doesn’t smell like rotten papaya, things to make sense, and
well, the beach. Oh and quiet,
America is SO quiet. We wake up to
screaming teenage boys, singing little girls, a water business with a microbus
blasting marimba, and then go to sleep with sounds of a circus and the
occasional concert next door.
BUT I get to say thank you every
day for my husband, for my girls, for my AMAZING community who belongs on a TV
show (Guatemalan, children home, Friends,
anybody??), an awesome living space despite it’s flaws, every single child
here, everybody who greets my growing baby with a belly rub (Baby Nash already
is the most loved baby to come into the world), wonderful Guatemalan
friends/staff, warm weather, plastic Christmas trees, health, internet to stay
in contact with family/friends back home, more than sufficient finances, and
lots of laughter, hugs, ridiculous braids, and SNACKS. (Our girls tell Jesus thank you for
snacks every night when they pray!)
These are the things of our life right now. It’s all grace, man! And lots of details. And joy. And fun. And some nausea. Oh, big update, Megan and I received rocking chairs for Christmas today!!! Lots of tea time, soaking in the sun on the cancha to come. These moms will make it through one more month of school break. The kids might poop their pants, throw rocks at Monty (the community dog), or sneak some extra sugar in, but Megs and I will be ok, we have rocking chairs. Thanks Alycia! And thanks to you who are taking the time to read about, care for, and be involved in our lives for a brief ratito. More to come, when the kiddos are back in school. Peace, ya’ll.
No comments:
Post a Comment